Thursday, November 3, 2011


Semi-Feral Mama posted this link and it's probably the best opinion I've read on international adoption. I Found myself agreeing with Cornell on every point. It was a relief to have someone put into such eloquent words what I had been grappling with for over a year and a half. But it was this paragraph in particular that really floored me:

"The way I think of it now is that my own action was what the literary theorist Gayatri Chakravorty Spivak has called an 'enabling violation.' I enabled my daughter’s life by adopting her, but in another sense it was a violation for my daughter, who was uprooted from her home, her language and her country of birth. I may have violated the people of Paraguay by participating in an adoption process that the vast majority of Paraguayans deeply disapproved of and ultimately sought to end. I have of course tried to make sure that my daughter always knew the story, not only of her adoption, but of what I could gather of her birth mother’s decision. But I will never feel at ease until my daughter and I visit her birth mother and hear it directly from her."

Also, a list of events that Dr. John Raible is speaking at. Someday I really hope to catch him.


Smiths said...

I really appreciate all the ways you've enlightened me through your experience with adoption and sweet Tariku, all the links, and the great book you gave me. I've realized how little I thought about what adoption means. I have so much to learn and am greatful for how open you are with many of your experiences and feeling throughout.

harriet glynn said...

Interesting. I know you read my adoption guilt post but in a lot of ways I feel the same way for a whole host of reasons. It just does not feel good to me to have someone else's baby even though they chose to do it. *sigh* Love your dude though. So handsome! My huzz is pinoy (fully though ;-)